Today may have not been the perfect day for the zoo weather wise (it was so hot!) but was great crowd wise. I was able to take Landon out of the stroller and let him do his own exploring. He loves walking around, finding (throwing) rocks+other treasures, and getting dirty. He got one mega scrape on his knee but he just brushed himself off with barely a whimper and kept on exploring. He loves animals. He gets more excited about an animal than anything else so the zoo definitely kept him entertained. They had a petting zoo and he showed no fear; just went right in and started petting those goats! At one point he even was laying his head close enough to the goats body, but not close enough to touch it... whenever we say "Landon, give Wilson (our one cat) a hug!" he puts his head on him, so it was cute that he was trying to give the goat a hug but perhaps knew enough not to lay his head on this unfamiliar farm animal. :)
Those who know me know that I struggle daily with motherhood. It doesn't come naturally to me. Don't get me wrong, I am so thankful every day that I get to be the mama of this wonderful, sweet, handsome, sometimes a little monster, little boy... but boy do I have a hard time with it. There are days where I absolutely cannot wait until bedtime (most days) but by the end of the day, after he's tucked away sleeping peacefully in his crib, I think about how absolutely amazing of a kid he is and how much I love him. Days like today, where we had such a fun time, makes me love being a mother. It's easier for me to type that out than actually say it out loud. Some days I feel the opposite. I get really emotional when I think about how much he's grown and how he's not going to be my "little guy" one day. As much as I struggle with his lack of verbal communication or I get so fed up with all the tantrums and the daily needs.. I just want time to slow down. He's nearing 19 months old. N-i-n-e-t-e-e-n months. How did we get here? Where did yesterday go? (the tears are coming right now..) I know it is only going to get better.. we'll be able to do more fun things, start doing art things together, t-ball games... but I'm always going to miss my baby.
And today when he led the way at the zoo, being independent and curious, it just made me realize again how big he's gotten and how much bigger he's going to get. Time, please slow down. Let me realize how amazing it is NOW to be a mama before all these younger years have flown by....
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